Oysters with Diarrhea

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May 28

So at a restaurant tonight...

  • Waitress: What would you all like to drink?
  • Friend 1: Coke.
  • Friend 2: Mountain Dew.
  • Friend 3: Mountain Dew.
  • Me: Pineapple Juice.
  • Friend 1: *points* Hipster!
  • Friend 2: *points* Hipster!
  • Friend 3: *points* Hipster!
  • Thanks, guys.

Posted 1 day ago

2 notes

hipster, hipsters, restaurant, diner, coke, mountain dew, pineapple juice, mainstream,

May 28
We were in Target.  This is how we entertain ourselves.

We were in Target.  This is how we entertain ourselves.

Posted 1 day ago

2 notes

the hunger games, hungry hungry hippos, target,

May 28
GOD DAMN IT, 7-11!

GOD DAMN IT, 7-11!

Posted 1 day ago

comic sans, breakfast sandwich, 7-11, seven eleven,

May 27

Three More Sonic 4-2 Remixes

Sylvania Castle Act 1

White Park Act 2

Sky Fortress Act 1

I might remaster the whole soundtrack if a MIDI is made for each level.  Not too sure yet.

Posted 2 days ago

sonic 4 episode 2, sonic the hedgehog, sonic the hedgehog music, sylvania castle, white park, sky fortress,

May 27

Do you write erotic Spongebob Squarepants fanfiction?

Anonymous

I should start that.  How’s Pearl x Mermaid Man?

Posted 2 days ago

May 26

What's your favorite brand of toilet paper?

Anonymous

None of them.  They all suck in their own different ways.  The soft ones feel nice up your ass, but they’re terrible when it comes to getting the shit out of there!  It feels like all it does is make it flaky and spread poop flakes in your butthole.  Any other kind does a better job at getting the poop out, but it stings after a bit!  It’s even worse when you have to go back because the poop far up your ass decided to come down into your sweat.

Was I descriptive enough for you?

Posted 3 days ago

May 26

Shit Parents Say

>WE CAN’T PUT THE AIR CONDITIONER ON BECAUSE MONEY!

>OPEN YOUR WINDOWS!  THE 90 DEGREE WEATHER WILL COOL YOUR ROOM DOWN!

Posted 3 days ago

shit parents say, air conditioning, summer, hot, hot weather,

May 26

My friend and I made one of those hipster pictures that have deep sayings on an unrelated photo.

R WE DOIN IT RITE GUYS?

R WE?!?!?!?!

Posted 3 days ago

3 notes

hipster, hipster edits, hipsters, eggs, deep, deep quotes,

May 25

I’ll just leave this here

Posted 4 days ago

2 notes

sonic 4 episode 2, sonic the hedgehog, oil desert, oil desert act 2, dying ducks, aflac, quack,

May 24

Do you have a mattress fetish?

Anonymous

Yes.  Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always had this strange attachment to mattresses.  It’s come to me googling images of mattresses on top of one another and being unable to take my eyes off.  One day, I plan to marry my mattress.  I just hope she says yes, and hopefully she can forgive me for all that jumping and wetting I did and move on from the past.

Posted 5 days ago